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Got an interesting email last week that I wanted to answer publicly. And, well, I kind of splurged on this one. The following email is from a man concerned about his relationships with women. In fact, I get just as many emails like the one below from women disparaging the manipulative men in their life as I do the opposite, so this has nothing to do with gender. Now, I know nobody thinks they are willing to deal with manipulative behaviors from their partners. But the truth is that most of us are terrible judges of manipulative behavior, both in our partners but also in ourselves.
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The manipulator deliberately creates an imbalance of power, and exploits the distance, and avoid engaging with the person unless you absolutely have to. Connect with me on LinkedIn No definition of the term seems sufficient, apart from the subjective one: If the other person tries to pivot to another topic, confuse the issue, or shift the responsibility onto you, don't be distracted. boundaries in a respectful and neutral way; recognize and avoid the other.
Healthy relationships are based on trust, mutual respect, and security. Each person must feel they are valued and loved unconditionally, accepted for who they are, and safe to expose their vulnerabilities and flaws. This is the ideal foundation for a good relationship, but of course, all of us fall short of this ideal from time to time.
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Toxic people such as malignant narcissists , psychopaths and those with antisocial traits engage in maladaptive behaviors in relationships that ultimately exploit, demean and hurt their intimate partners, family members and friends.